In the Deepest Grief
On March 25, 2020, we released our fourth child back into the arms of Jesus. At nearly five months pregnant I was induced to deliver our daughter, Nora, after an ultrasound revealed that her little body no longer had a heartbeat.
Due to the restrictions enforced from Covid-19 during that time, Geoff and I found ourselves alone in a hospital room... weeping, worshiping and waiting together to meet the daughter that we knew we wouldn't be able to bring home.
In the deepest grief that I'd ever known, I can remember feeling more alone than I had ever been. Facing the reality of my shattered heart as a mom, met by the weight and pain of labor and delivery... contraction after contraction, hour after hour... it was a road that only I could walk.
The Man of Sorrows Met Me
As that day turned to evening, with my husband praying over me, I closed my eyes in a moment of worship when suddenly I entered into a life-changing encounter with Jesus Christ. It was there that I was taken into a vision, where I found myself standing on a quiet cliffside beneath the foot of the cross.
As I looked up to see Jesus, crucified and having just taken His final breath, the wind of the Spirit began to blow, and the whisper of His voice came, "It won't last forever."
Looking up at Him, with tears streaming down my face, it was in that moment that I went from feeling so forsaken to feeling the most seen, understood, loved, and held that I had ever been, as the Man of Sorrows met me through a revelation of His cross. (Photo via Pixabay)
Lying in that hospital bed, I wasn't alone but so very known in my humanity by the eternal Savior who, too, once coursed a road that only He could walk. As His words echoed and His presence met me, so did the empowerment of His grace. We'd deliver and share three beautifully sacred hours with our daughter, and then release her to Jesus until eternity, where we will see her again.
In my hardest hour, the wind of His Spirit came and not only sustained but changed my life forever.
No Other Love like This
To those who may currently be navigating great heartache and grief, though I don't know the sorrow surrounding your season, I want to encourage you today that there is a God who does—a man named Jesus who desires to make Himself known by the depths, beauty, and power of His cross.
Through Him I received peace; through Him I found joy, hope, strength, healing, and life.
The same will be true of your story: beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, and a garment of praise for a spirit of heaviness. He sees you, He knows you, and He understands. There isn't another love like His.
I pray you encounter Him afresh today, even now in this moment. May the wind of His Spirit meet you and sustain you, may the strength of His grace empower you and keep you, and may your life in Him be changed forevermore.
He will show Himself faithful.
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Chloie Stafford
Co-director of The Altar School Â
Website:Â www.chloiestafford.com
Chloie Stafford serves in ministry at The Altar Global as the co-director of The Altar School, a role she shares with her husband, Geoff, to disciple and equip Believers for the work of the Kingdom. As a prophetic voice, Chloie is driven by a deep passion to see Jesus Christ receive His full inheritance in the earth. She releases the heart of God through dreams and visions to prepare a lovesick people who will usher in the day of His return.
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